Hmmm...

The election is less than a week away. And let me just tell you frankly what I think:

Obama MUST win this election!

I was willing to give the Republican candidate the benefit of the doubt earlier this year, but UGH. I've lost my faith in him. McCain is becoming a PAIN, and it's quite obvious that he's a sore loser, especially when he knows that Obama's leading in the polls. All he does is pump his fists and complain, using demagogue mud-slinging tactics in a pathetic attempt to win voter support. I mean, I respect him for his services in the armed forces and even surviving as a POW in the Vietnam war, but I'm starting to lose faith in his leadership competency. He's just a hothead to me now. He knows he's got nothing much to offer except more of the same. Ninety to ninety-five percent of the time he voted for Bush's policies - the very ones that have led this country to this downhill rollercoaster of a spiral.

As for McCain's pinhead Barbie-doll of a running mate, Palin is getting annoying. She just made a buffoon out of herself by showing up on SNL, particularly when the sketches were dripping with satire on her expense. Does she even realize that this only hurt McCain's campaign? This is NOT a popularity/personality contest. It's as if this election's a joke to her. I still think that McCain merely chose Palin as his running mate for these three reasons:

(a) to sway Hillary fans over to his side,
(b) to drill more oil in Alaska (We're STILL screwed when the oil runs out.), and
(c) to go down in the history books as the president who has a woman as his second-in-command (that is, IF he even wins this election)

At least Barack Obama keeps it real and clearly tells you straight-up where he stands on an issue, and he can do so cleanly and smoothly without talking SHIT about his opponent. He CARES about US, the regular people living in this country who work hard everyday. My mother really needs this tax cut that he's proposing. She works two jobs everyday of the week and barely has any time for herself. People like her need a break. With a fragile economy threatening to crack and shatter, it'll be hard to keep up with the rising prices and increasingly high standard of living. As far as I can see, Obama's more focused, and the fact that he's liberal only goes to show that he's really going to implement change for the better. McCain's got nothing. So yeah... To anyone who's reading this, please vote for Obama this coming Tuesday.

These thoughts I've been having about the election were brewing in my head. I just felt that I needed to get my views on it across because I'm sick of the ignorance, lies, and half-truths that McCain's been spreading in his predominantly negative campaign ads. It's just downright dirty. I don't want a vindictive old coot as president. And if McCain does indeed have something to offer to the Oval Office, then I have yet to see what his policies are going to be. Give me substance! I want to hear it from him simple and straight-up, without the immature finger-pointing. If only he knew there are three fingers pointing right back at him - his own. But I guess it's too late now.

My choice is clear.

Here's to a hopeful future, my friends.

"Immersion"

Well, I was looking through my old journals and rereading some of the memories I scribbled furiously when I had some minutes to spare. I found this poem that I wrote for Poetry Slam, a seminar that was hosted at my high school during junior year. It was actually supposed to be performed as a verse, part of a collaboration with the other students' poems to create a whole piece. We were actually supposed to present it at the Winter Talent Show in 2007, but we never got to do it because we never really got to finish it. I guess I'll just treat mine as a separate piece and give it a title of its own like the other poems I've written in the past. This one happens to be about the passion for music and the emotions that it evokes. I tried to add some imagery, alliteration, rhyme, and cadence so that the poem would take on a life of its own, just like a song.

Here it is:

"Immersion"

I revel in the reveries
The lyrical lies and truths tell -
Mesmerizing, drawing me deeper
To dive in and swim under the sea of its spell.
When jubilant and upbeat, I rock and tap my feet
To the sound, laughing away as I spin around.
Yet beware of the ire that could spark,
For it is the fire that burns, consuming my heart.
When broken and caught in misery's pain,
I hum melodies soft-spoken to dry off from the rain.
But I bounce back and find my rhythm once more
Amid the dissonance, knowing one thing for sure:
Life is a song, descending and rising in crescendos,
The pitch either high or low.
Immerse myself in the music, twirling and dancing in the flow.

The Remedy

I take back what I said in my last post - the "socially inept" part. It's just that I feel so awkward sometimes. But life's just like that - full of changes you may or may not adjust to so easily. I'm trying to "Remedy" that. This song makes an awesome mantra when in doubt. hehe :)

Pris and Lily finally gave me the details on the Jason Mraz concert they went to Friday last week! And I heard he can dance salsa! I wish I had gone with them, considering the awesome seats that they were able to score, but the tickets they paid for cost about $150 (GOSH, I need a job). I can just imagine their excitement... Lily would have been screaming out the lyrics to the sultry-yet-oh-so-beautifully-poetic "Butterfly," our all-time favorite song from Mr.A-Z. If a guy serenaded me with that song, I'd swoon. Who wouldn't with lyrics that go like this?:

"Butterfly, well you float on by
Oh kiss me with your eyelashes tonight
Or Eskimo your nose real close to mine
And let's mood the lights and finally make it right
But you don't fold, you don't fade, you've got everything you need
Especially me
Sister you've got it all

Butterfly, well you landed on my mind
Dammit you landed on my ear and then you crawled inside
Now I see you perfectly behind closed eyes
I wanna fly with you and I don't wanna lie to you
Cause I, cause I can't recall a better day
I'm coming to shine on the occasion"

... Well, I guess you catch my drift. What's even cooler is that he even choreographed a dance that the audience could groove to while he performed "The Dynamo of Volition." He also supports Obama! While playing "Live High" he showed pictures of the smiling senator during the lines "Try to picture the man/To always have an open hand/See him as a giving tree/See him as matter/Matter fact he's not a beast/No not the devil either/Always a good deed doer/And it's laughter that we're makin after all..."

Before he even started playing his songs, there was this presentation filled with photos sent in by fans, followed by words that described his favorites and highlighted his personality such as, "sushi," "Obama," "wet dreams" (Lily screamed upon seeing this. LOL), and "polaroids." I don't think that many artists do this - just being themselves and celebrating the music that moves us all. It's one of the reasons why Jason Mraz is on my list of favorite artists. Next time he's in NYC, I am definitely going to one of his concerts! I also made a new playlist and posted it here at the very bottom of this page featuring some of his awesome songs.

On Thursday, Pris and I were on Facebook, just messing around with each other's profiles and watching some of the concert videos she posted. She then DARED me to be confident, to try talking to this guy that I really find intriguing. I absolutely freaked out when I realized she was serious. I admit that I hated her guts for a moment, since I usually get nervous and freeze up around a guy I think I might actually like. But she was right - the worst that could happen is rejection. And he was really nice! I still wish I could get to know him better and feel more comfortable with myself around him. As Jordin Sparks would sing, "One step a time, there's no need to rush. It's like learning to fly or falling in love. It's gonna happen when it's supposed to happen that we find the reasons why."

I also hung out with Lily Thursday evening. We met up in Union Square in front of the Whole Foods store and then walked to the Apple Store to check out the new MacBooks and the iPhone. The funny thing was, I had no idea that we were walking in Soho the entire time. I'd never actually been there before until then. Lily even pointed out to me the building that was supposedly the office building of Grace Adler in the show Will & Grace, shown here:

Hey, you learn something everyday. ;)

I was also kind of bored yesterday that I started looking up one of my favorite shows, The Tudors, online. I can't wait for Season 3 to start. Even though I already know exactly what will happen (given my fascination with European history), it's still pretty awesome seeing it in a dramatic and pretty accurate portrayal. Jonathan Rhys Meyers and Henry Cavill just feed my passion for watching it. Anyway, I clicked on one of the links and found out that you can make your own royal portrait using one of your most "regal-looking" pictures.

Here's one of the pics I tried to manipulate. I look ridiculous. lol.

Hopefully next week brings more eye-opening experiences. I'm just trying to go with the flow right now.

Wanted: A Fire to Inspire.

It's been a long day so far... I feel so alone. I'm here at the library, wondering what to do for the next couple of hours or so until my Psych class. Priscilla's not here - she texted me this morning and told me. My other friends have classes, so meeting up is out of the question. And I have no idea how to approach other people, even if I try. Call me socially inept. I should have brought my journal with me. I should do that more often. Write, that is. I haven't been writing for a while. I'm always so tired. I need to get myself out of this fix. Maybe I'm just jaded.

I need some motivation. An inspiration.

Life at home keeps bothering me, too. My mother never stops criticizing me or my sisters or my dad. And at least twice a day my sisters would pick fights with each other. Sometimes when I just want to be alone, I can't. I haven't been really able to concentrate on the things that I want to do, on the goals that I set for myself.

I need to reorganize my life, it seems.

At least there are books to comfort me, as well as my favorite television shows. I could tune out of my reality for a while and tune in to something that would keep my mind occupied for the meantime. So far, they're the only things I have to look forward to, though a few of my shows are on hold because of the presidential debates.

Speaking of which, I just registered to vote this past Saturday, on the 11th. It was the last day to register, and I went to the local public school to fill up that little blue card. That was the third time I registered. I had mailed the first two registration cards earlier this year, but whenever I checked the website to see my voter status, I still was not registered. It was odd, considering the fact that I mailed the first one around March, right after I turned 18 in February. But my parents, who became U.S. citizens in June, got their voter identification cards in September. So I just tried it again. Hopefully third time's the charm. I'm leaning towards Barack Obama. McCain's not really reaching out to me, and God forbid something happens to him if he actually does become president - I really do not want Sarah Palin to fill in his shoes. I read an article in AMNY about how some feminists were wondering why they fought for feminism in the first place, only to have a VP candidate make a laughing stock out of herself. Hillary Clinton, on the other hand, would have totally rocked as president. She was more serious about it and did not feed the public some kind of "folksy" image in order to get them to vote for her like Palin. McCain, I think, simply wanted to be in the history books as the president who chose a woman for his running mate. It's fine if he does that, but he really should have chosen someone else who was more experienced and actually answers the questions given to her, rather than just beating around the bush and dodging the questions altogether. And anyway, I truly think that Obama's going to bring change. Nevermind that he's young compared to the other presidents we've had so far. He knows what he's talking about. So yeah... there's my two cents on my civic duties come November 4th.

I'm going to read up on the progress of the election more often. And I'm going to try to finish that fantasy story I've been plotting for the longest time, since the spring. Maybe those will finally give me a sense of purpose.

A nice mini-break... followed by a false brake on my morning momentum

The mini-vacation that just passed was pleasant enough.

On Monday, I got the chance to meet up with some of my high school friends. We hung out at Union Square - stuffing our faces with Chipotle burritos and then some frozen yogurt with fruit at Red Mango afterward. Then we paid a little visit to the Academy of American Studies, the high school we all attended. Priscilla and sat in the back of the classroom during AP Euro, wondering how long it would take for Ms. Tuite to spot us amidst her new class of sophomores and seniors. It took about 10 minutes... and someone standing up near us for her to finally notice. She laughed and got so excited. Later on, we saw my old Spanish teacher, Ms. Agudelo, and my AP English teacher, Mr. Avitabile. It was pretty nice chatting with them, and it felt weird to be back. The atmosphere was still the same, but the new faces of scared freshmen and the idea of the former juniors (now seniors) graduating in June 2009 was something we needed to get used to. But at least we took away the memories with us that day - we finally picked up the long-awaited senior yearbook and flipped through all the pages of laughter and smiles. It sounds cheesy, but it was a nice feeling to be back, if only for a little while.

I spent the other days of the mini-break waking up at around 11:00, just lounging around my house, raiding the fridge, and watching all the shows I missed on sidereel.com. It felt wonderful to not have to worry about anything... until this morning.

To start it off, my printer was not cooperating with me when I wanted to print out the powerpoint slides for my Psych class. Supposedly it was not connected to the computer. But I checked all the connections - the USB cable, the power cord, and I even restarted everything - but unfortunately, to no avail. Just my luck. I mean, I did the reading for Psych, and even took notes while I read, but to just to make sure, I always print out the slides for my own reference during class (and to write notes on the margin) because my professor zooms through the lessons.

Second - the L train was not cooperating. I left my house on time, and would have actually gotten to campus with at least 15 minutes to spare. But the L trains were delayed. One moment I thought that I'd be on my way. But, no. The train was stranded. That's right. Stranded for over half an hour in the tunnel, waiting for the problem to be resolved. To top it all off, when the train DID finally move, it moved at a slower speed (oxymoronic, if you ask me). Someone next to me even joked, "How about no speed?" because the train would stop for about 10 minutes in between each subway station. It was ridiculous! At least the conductor had the decency to tell it straight over the intercom: "We are sorry for the inconvenience, but a customer - yes, a customer like you - on another train ahead of us pulled the emergency brake when there was no emergency. That's why we are all still here, and all the trains are backed up. In the future, please be aware that you should not pull the emergency brake if no emergency is present. Again, we are sorry for the inconvenience. Please be patient."

I was stuck inside the L train for over an hour when finally, blissfully, it rolled into 14th St. Union Square. I kept checking my watch as I transferred to the 6 train, but felt that it was useless. I was late anyway. All thanks to the genius who pulled the false alarm. Idiot. Sorry about that, but in essence, it is the perfect word to describe the uncalled for event.

Fifteen minutes later, I finally reached 68th Street. But only with 20 minutes of class left to spare. I debated with myself... Should I go in and apologize to the instructor for my tardiness (which wasn't my fault) and feel mortified in front of the class? Or should I just forego going to Statistics for today and send an email? If I chose the latter, should I feign sickness or pretend I had a doctor's appointment? Or would the instructor be understanding of my unplanned predicament? Class ended half an hour ago. It's now 11:30.

Whatever. I may as well tell the truth. And humbly ask for the homework assignment. If only this never happened... But I guess, as is the way of life - you just have to deal with it.

I just hope the rest of my day goes well...
A toast: here's to the future.