Procrastination, Psi Chi, and Penning Criticisms

So I'm back. Sort of. I just thought that I should update since I haven't written anything on here for a long time. School, stress, and tiredness are the three culprits that deter me from blogging. I wish I was more prolific with writing more blog posts, and I wish that these posts were more inspiring or more thought-provoking.

I've written some pretty good essays for my classes this semester, though. I'm actually surprised that I was able to score some really good marks on them. Procrastination has always been a friend of mine, and he always pushes me to write my essay assignments at the last possible hour. It's obviously not a very good way to go. Up to now, I still haven't learned how to successfully manage my time. I usually just shut my eyes and cross my fingers when I hand in something and hope for the best, even when the effort I put into each paper wasn't always my best. What you give is what you get, usually.

On one paper I had to write for personality psychology, for instance, I had received a check-minus. That paper was supposed to explain (from Rentfrow et al., 2006) a model of the geographical distribution of personality traits across U.S. states. It was probably one of my worst-written papers, since I wrote it about three hours before it was due. All I did was summarize the article instead of adding analysis or critique, which was probably the worst thing that anyone could have done on an article review. I'm not trying to excuse my crappy effort in writing that particular paper, but the article was too long and too dry to read, and it was loaded with statistics. I don't know about you, but I only have a basic understanding of statistics. I doubt the average Joe or average Jane would understand the jargon, either.

In any case, some of the other papers I've written for my Islam & Buddhism class, as well as for my Asian-American Women Writers class, turned out pretty well. I'll try to post them here at a later date to share (and if you decide you use them in your own writing, please cite them).

I've also recently conducted an online survey on academic procrastination and Facebook usage for my research project in my experimental social psychology class. I had some trouble yesterday when I was entering the data on SPSS because I wasn't sure how to score the Procrastination Assessment Scale-Students (PASS). (Interesting acronym for the scale, right?) Thank goodness I was able to figure it out. I'm still scratching my head, though. When I tried to run correlations between the degree to which students procrastinated and their desire to decrease these procrastination behaviors, something weird happened with the scatter plots.They ended up looking like a stem-and-leaf plot. I don't know if I ran the analysis wrong in using the wrong measure, but that's what I ended up with. Here's to hoping that my professor won't be too harsh when I present the results to the rest of the class.

Worries aside, at least something good has happened to me recently: I've been accepted into Psi Chi, the International Honor Society for Psychology. It's great to know that all those semesters of studying and hard work have paid off in some way. On December 1st, I'll be an official member of Psi Chi.

Anyway, in other recent events:

I've also been active on Twilightsucks.com. They've moved to a new site, so if you're interested in checking it out, here's the web address. I love reading the topics that they have there regarding issues such as Meyer's erroneous exaltation of her Twilight Saga (it's NOT a saga, people!), Meyer's less-than-savory writing skills, Edward's creepiness, Bella's idiocy and dry narration, the abhorrence of Meyerwolf imprinting, and the nature of what vampires actually are. There's also a bunch of sub-forums for discussing other literary works according to their respective genres (such as Stephen King's works, J.K. Rowling's HP series, Charlotte Bronte, Sarah Dessen, etc.), as well as a series of sub-forums dedicated to sharing and discussing writing tips. If you want to make a club, you can petition to create your own club. If you want to talk about movies (not just the Twilight movies) or television shows, then you can also discuss them in their respective sub-forums. TS is a pretty cool site overall, and its members are also just as enthusiastic and thought-provoking when it comes to discussing and critiquing literature, film, television, music, just about anything, really. You just have to know where to look, read up on the past comments, and join in the conversation. The writing forums, especially, have helped me with my own writing.

I've often found that discussing books that bother you can teach you a whole lot more about writing than books that you've absolutely loved reading. Why? Let's just say that you can often spot the mistakes and the bullshit more quickly with a book that's bothered you than with a book you deem as the quintessential story. Another website that's similar to TS is Reasoning With Vampires. Not only does it provide you with a good laugh about how stupid or disturbing some parts of Twilight are, but the site also points out the ineffectiveness of Meyer's grammar and diction. Good things to know when you're crafting your own stories.

I enjoyed these particular posts from Reasoning With Vampires the most:

Finally, there's this:

I hope you learned a few things and enjoyed these tidbits, which were brought to you by Reasoning With Vampires.

Getting Somewhere - Books with (Good) Bite and Digging Up Words

I'm almost done reading Charlotte Bronte's Jane Eyre! I've only ever seen a couple of movie versions of it (they weren't really that great). Reading the actual book, the actual words that Charlotte penned, is so much better than I expected. It's actually more engaging than Emily Bronte's Wuthering Heights, which I never even finished, having never gotten past the first three pages as a result of Emily's writing style. But to each her own, I guess. I'm reading the Norton Critical Edition of Jane Eyre, complete with literary criticisms, transcriptions of letters Charlotte wrote to her publishers, and essays on feminism.

I also downloaded a few e-books from this website called Scribd, including a series about vampires. If you haven't already guessed, I'm a sucker for these kinds of stories... Excuse the pun. Although, in my defense, I've been a fan of vampire stories since I was twelve years old, when I saw a movie version of Bram Stoker's Dracula starring Gary Oldman and Winona Ryder (which I think came out in 1992) and also some episodes of Buffy (they were random, and I'd watch them when I had the time), as well as the original film that inspired the Buffy TV series. Since then I read Dracula, and I read Amelia Atwater-Rhodes's Den of Shadows series (and a couple of her shape-shifter stories), some stand-alone chick-lit novels featuring the bloodsuckers, and of course (which is probably in every pre-teen's literary canon -- I say this in the sense that these tweens will treat Meyer's stories as if they were Gospel truth. Shocked? Me, too.) the Twilight Saga. So enough explanation.

I like vampires. Even though I was completely terrified of them in the 1st grade after watching Nosferatu and those documentaries on the paranormal. I was so scared that I actually slept with my covers over my head, thinking that my blanky was a nifty shield against any bat that might crawl through my window looking to suck the life out of my neck.

Yeah, I know. I had a vivid imagination as a kid. Didn't you?

Anyway, if you're just looking for something entertaining, funny, and refreshing to read, I suggest you check out the Blood Coven series by Mari Mancusi.

Book 1: Boys That Bite

Book 2: Stake That

Book 3: Girls That Growl

Book 4: Bad Blood

I'm planning on reading them next, once I finish Jane Eyre and the last installment of L.J. Smith's Vampire Diaries. If you're interested in reading the Blood Coven series, just let me know. I can send you the ebooks.

I'm also planning to read the books by Charlaine Harris on which the HBO TV series True Blood is based. I'm still waiting for season 3 to start.

Ditto with The Vampire Diaries. I'm almost done with the last book. The only thing I'll be looking foward to in the fall would be season 2 -- it's getting really juicy, what with Damon suddenly trying to be good in order to impress Elena (who's already taken by Stefan and only sees Damon as a friend) and Katharine (YES, Elena's doppleganger) comes back to Mystic Falls!

While I have these two shows/book series in mind, I have to share my current TV infatuations (aside from Ethan Peck, who doesn't play a vampire, hehe). And the gorgeous guys are...

Alexander Skarsgard -- aka "Eric" on True Blood

Ian Somerhalder -- aka "Damon" on The Vampire Diaries

Vampires must really dig leather, the way Victorians had a fetish for lace, don't you think? "You can be my leather. Take from me my lace..." Hahaha!

They can bite my neck anytime! At least, the fictional characters that they portray on television can. I heard they have girlfriends in real life (go figure), so if I got anyone's hopes up... Sorry. Now that that's out of the way, permit me to throw a bucket of ice water over my head. Ahem.

I'm back. That was refreshing. Okay, I didn't literally do that. But I did wash my face and drink some water, which did the trick. So, where was I? Oh, yes. I just finished my vampire-obsession spiel, hehe.

As for my own writing...
For the past couple of weeks, let me put it in terms of Lolcats:

However, I also had some progress. After ignoring the story I've been working on for quite some time, I finally listened to the nagging voice in the back of my brain that kept telling me something was off. I just didn't know what it was at the time. But now I do.

The timing -- the pacing of the story was going too fast, with not enough conflicts in each chapter, and not enough appearances of a major character. Plus, I had some major editing to do with chapters that I felt didn't flow that well to fit in with the rest of the plot points. I've also had to do some character study -- that is to say, I had to imagine the world through the other characters' perspectives in order to understand their motivations behind their actions. They seemed kind of... hollow until I focused on them somewhat more, creating their backstories (even if I wasn't really going to use most of it). And so, with all of this bouncing back and forth, and some Facebooking in between (Sorority Life is ridiculous, but so addictive!), I tried my best. I even stopped searching for good music for a while because that tends to greatly distract me from ever getting anywhere.

Though I did find some more interesting songs -- some of them recommended by a couple of friends and others discovered on Purevolume or on one of the online AOL indie rock stations -- I eventually decided that I'd probably be better off writing in silence for a bit.

So far?

The silence (save for the whirring of the electric fan amid the summer heat) helped me regain focus a little. I was able to write a few more pages. Granted, there's always editing to do, but at least for the time being, I got somewhere. I also figured out how to add more scenes in between to make the plot richer with more conflict and more ways to torture my protagonist (not that I hate her or anything... but whining is a big thing with her, so if you plan to read any excerpts I decide to put up in the future, be forewarned, hehe).

In any case, I'm off to write again. And then explore the new literature blogs I found after I run out of steam, like this one that gives book reviews (sorry, they talk about vampires again -- but they talk about other things in their posts, too! I swear!): Litbites.

Until next time, friends!

Some Feministic Lulz! (May Contain Twi-Saga Spoilers)

YAY! My finals are over and I am officially on summer vacation! Which means... More time to read, write, watch tv, listen to music, hang out with friends, and relax!

If you thought I sounded high in my last post, you're probably right. I had one too many cups of coffee. Now that I'm a little bit more subdued, thanks to sleep-recovery and a healthy dose of much-needed escapist television watching (DWTS winner Nicole! Woot! I wish Evan won a trophy, too, though -- a second-place trophy. He's a fantastic dancer! And he'd be so HOT as a vampire [skip to 2:24], ahahhaha), let me try clarifying what I meant in my caffeine-stupor post.

I won't lie.

I liked reading Twilight and its subsequent follow-ups (except for Breaking Dawn... stupid hype made me not want to read it anymore. And because each book got more and more ridiculous). I was in love with Edward Cullen. I actually wished I was Bella. I wanted sparkly, marble-framed, mind-reading, sleep-watching Edward for myself. And I also wanted goofy, funny, and totally hot werewolf-changing-mostly-shirtless Jacob Black to want me.

Why?

Because I was 15 years old at the time and I was a hopeless romantic/melodramatic teenager. (Thank goodness I grew out of that phase.)

I didn't know what love was. I still don't. But now, after what? Five years or so? I know it's not as dazzling as Stephenie Meyer makes it out to be in her novels, even though some (or maybe zillions, considering its undaunting popularity) beg to differ. I try to read her books, or any book for that matter, with a grain of salt.

Hence, I joined the dark side. Also known as the "Lolfans" (as coined by blogger Cleolinda Jones), who read and watch all things Twilight for the simple pleasure of the "lulz." In other words, to critique and occasionally (okay, mostly) use comedy as a tool to make social commentary on the franchise.

(Warning: Please prepare yourself for hours lost due to clicking random links [some of them featured in this post] that may either offend or entertain you -- assuming that you actually click them, that is. I'm about to get particularly spammy, posting a host of different links.)

Let's try poking a little fun at literary and pop culture icons, shall we? ;)

I absolutely hate it when the female protagonist defines herself as an extension of her boyfriend/husband/what-have-you. I guess that's why I hated reading Kate Chopin's The Awakening and Leo Tolstoy's Anna Karenina. By the way... why does LEVIN end up happy, and not Anna? I smell misogyny...

In case you're not familiar with Anna Karenina, or need a disturbing reminder:
Anna was a rich Russian housewife who fell for a studly miltary officer named Vronsky and left her husband to be with the dashing hunk. But then her relationship with him falls apart because Vronsky keeps taking her for granted. So after much suffering and grief at how cruddy her life turned out to be, Anna feels completely worthless and gets an idea. In excruciating, frame-by-frame slow-mo...

Here comes the train...

Sigh... Why can't Vronsky love me the way he used to?

There was once a time when I was happy and full of life, before all this misery.

I can see it now...

I was so young, so fair... so innocent and carefree...

I remember diving into the unknown, to feel alive. But now...

I must let go, and free-fall into the abyss...

No, I am not smoking cannabis. I am quite serious about this! That is train smoke you see! TRAIN SMOKE! Do you not know what this MEANS?

Lord, forgive me all!

And now I look like a Jackson Pollock painting.

Disturbed?
I, for one, still shudder at the thought. (If you want to watch it yourself: click here)

So you can imagine my reaction when I read the part in New Moon where Bella tries to off herself by jumping off a cliff. As seen in the movie:



Bella, for a girl who reads a lot of heavy classic literature and aces her English classes, I expected you to be smarter! You might as well have some girl talk with Edna, Anna, and Juliet and spill your problems. Just be thankful you four gals are not Ophelia. Poor Ophelia's on-and-off boyfriend Hamlet killed her rat of a father, and even suggested that she go to a "nunnery" (or whorehouse, depending on your interpretation) because he's too insane (gasp! -- or is he?) and dangerous to be with her. Maybe you guys should have a sleepover and a...

A scavenger hunt! Like the girls in this movie!



Maybe you should all go on a scavenger hunt looking for your BFs!
Whoever finds their guy first WINS A PRIZE!

What is this prize, you ask? HAPPILY EVER AFTER!

As for YOU, Edward... you're an arse. There are easier ways to kill yourself than to expose your sparkly self to innocent tourists in Italy and to bring on the wrath of the Volturi. Like maybe douse yourself in kerosene, lock yourself inside your Volvo, and then strike a match? GENIUS.

Here are the reasons why I avoided reading Breaking Dawn so far... but now that I think about it, maybe I should read it. You know, to be an informed critic (and laugh, and then rage at how inconsistent and disturbing the details will be):

WHY IS IT that in Breaking Dawn, Edward gets to have a baby and not Rosalie? They're both vampires, UNDEAD FREAKS, and yet it's the GUY who gets to pass on his genes?! What? Edward has WONDERSPERM, or something?!

And to quote from Cleolinda Jones's recap of Book One in Breaking Dawn (Her words in purple text, while passages from Meyer's book are in italic purple)...

Bella is having a small pre-sexing breakdown in the bathroom. You know, I actually think this part is kind of well done, because I’m sure a lot of teenage girls reading the book can relate to anxiety about having sex for the first time. I mean, not so much with the marrying a filthy rich dazzling vampire, but then, that just makes the parts they can identify with so much more meaningful, don’t you think? Anyway, Bella finally joins Edward for a sensual midnight swim, and MAN, that was an abrupt fade to black. Also: TWO FOR FOUR! Thank God.

“How badly are you hurt?”


GOD, EDWARD. Someone thinks highly of himself. Also: STOP BEING SUCH A BUZZKILL, SPARKLESON. But wait!

“You . . . bit a pillow? Why?”


Bella, honey, there's a reason there's a queen on the cover of this book.



“Look, Bella!” he almost growled. He took my hand—very gingerly—and stretched my arm out.    “Look at that.”
 This time, I saw what he meant.
 Under the dusting of feathers, large purplish bruises were beginning to blossom across the pale skin of my arm. My eyes followed the trail they made up to my shoulder, and then down across my ribs. I pulled my hand free to poke at a discoloration on my left forearm, watching it fade where I touched and then reappear.


Okay, that is actually fantastically creepy--waking up and looking down and having no idea that you’ve been all jacked up to hell. I will say sincerely here, well done. Unless… it wasn’t supposed to be creepy. Because it so is.


Also: The pillow-biting will never, ever stop cracking my shit up. Ever. OM NOM ROUGH SEX NOM.

Also-also, you know what? I bet half the problem would have been solved here if they hadn’t been in the missionary position. No, this is not actually stated. Whatever, you know they were.

“That,” I snapped. “That right there is why I’m angry. You are killing my buzz, Edward.”


AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I swear to you, I am writing this in real time—I had absolutely no idea she was going to say that.

OKAY, LET’S NOW ANGST ABOUT WHO THE SEX WAS BETTER FOR. SURE, LET’S DO THAT.

He touched the frown line between my eyebrows. “I’m making you unhappy now. I don’t want to do that.”
“Then don’t you be unhappy. That’s the only thing that’s wrong here.”


How about we all stop being unhappy? Look, you go fir—okay, let’s all stop being unhappy on the count of three, okay? OKAY?

Heeeeeee, Edward learned to cook breakfast from the Food Network.

(So many things have—probably for the best—been left unaddressed here. I mean, was it like fucking a popsicle? These are the questions I find myself asking.)

(Also, I foresee some horrifically awkward fan encounters in Robert Pattinson’s future. “So what positions do you think they did it in, tee hee!” He is probably going to want to upgrade the security system in his hair for that.)


Oh, the guilty, guilty pleasures of reading recaps... [insert evil laugh here]

Um, so yeah... I might actually read Breaking Dawn now. When put in the terms above, it might actually be worth the while (especially since the it's going to be split into two movies, with Oscar-winning director Bill Condon in charge of things... wonder if they'll be any good).

I also found this link someone shared on Cleolinda's blog, featuring a spoof on the birth of Bella's daughter. This is just too funny:

With that said, I'd really hate to be Bella.

I'd rather be Buffy.

Or Kat Stratford.

OH, AND JANE EYRE! (The novel which I'm currently reading, by the way.)

I like having strong female characters I can look up to and talk about. They don't let anyone compromise their principles, and they don't let anyone put them in a corner.

I guess that's why I prefer reading Meg Cabot's The Mediator series when it comes to paranormal romance. Heck, I'd love to be Suze Simon, too! (If there's ever going to be a movie version of the series, I'M SO TOTALLY WATCHING IT!)

Here's Meg's parody, which can also be found on her website. I absolutely love her witticism!



Did you answer "YES" to 2 or more of the quiz's questions and are concerned over the fate of your relationship? Call 1-800-BLADE.

So.

Want more Twi-Saga lulz? Enjoy the following links!

Here's a hilarious series of IM exchanges on livejournal that imagines Edward as a prissy, neat-freak scrap-booking virgin:

"Growing Up Cullen Part 1"

(Edward's cleanliness and scrapbooking fixations)

"Growing Up Cullen Part 2"

(in which Edward is appalled by certain visuals...)

"Growing Up Cullen Part 3"

(complete with Edward's laundry schedule!)

"Growing Up Cullen Part 4"
(in which Edward keeps track of Bella's er... cycle)

"Growing Up Cullen Part 5"
(Christmas with the Cullens... oh, dear)

A blog by one of the "Growing Up Cullens" authors.
... And for everything else that has to do with "Growing Up Cullen"


An article from Empire Magazine, thanks again to Cleolinda, in which, I kid you not -- RPattz actually says the following:

"When you read the book," says Pattinson, looking appropriately pallid and interesting even without makeup, "it's like, 'Edward Cullen was so beautiful I creamed myself.' I mean, every line is like that. He's the most ridiculous person who's so amazing at everything. I think a lot of actors tried to play that aspect. I just couldn't do that. And the more I read the script, the more I hated this guy, so that's how I played him, as a manic-depressive who hates himself. Plus, he's a 108-year-old virgin so he's obviously got some issues there."


If you haven't seen Buffy kick Edward's butt yet (which I mentioned 2 posts ago), check it out on Jonathan McIntosh's site. He's the clever creator of the video.

Here's a funny comic... in which Spike feels like he's walkin' on sunshine.


Until next time... Happy reading! ;)

Twilight and Philosophy... and Bella's Smartness... and Buffy Beating Up Edward

YES, two posts in a row! I should be writing right now, but I couldn't wait to sink my teeth into this one!

Whether you're a Twi-tard, or annoyed by the vamp craze, or don't really care either way, I suggest you give the book Twilight and Philosophy: Vampires, Vegetarians, and the Pursuit of Immortality a shot. It analyzes the books, the movies, the vampire fascination, and morality through -- in case you haven't already guessed it -- the lens of philosophical questions. The essays are written by a variety of college professors and philosophy scholars/students, so there's a whole variety of opinions and attitudes, all putting forth to the table a mix of arguments that you can either take or leave as food for thought.

So to give you a snapshot of some of the topics explored in this book, here's a list of questions:

- What can vampires tell us about the meaning of life?
            (This one's pretty cool. Immortality can get boring.)
- Is Edward a romantic hero or a dangerous stalker?
            (Romantic... sure. But Ed becomes a bit of a control freak, wouldn't you say so? Maybe even borderline psychotic at times? Enter the classic line from Buffy: "You know, being stalked isn't really a big turn on for girls.")
- Is Bella a feminist? Is Stephenie Meyer?
            (Um... do vampires ever stop drinking blood? Thought so.)
- How does Stephenie Meyer's Mormonism fit into the fantastical world of Twilight?
            (Bits and pieces of it do... Our attitudes and beliefs help shape our writing, after all.)
- Is Jacob "better" for Bella than Edward?
            (Personally, I'd say YES. He's loyal, dependable... everything I'd want in a boyfriend. Oh, wait... I'm describing a dog, aren't I? Sorry, Jake. No pun intended, considering the whole werewolf thing. But I'd still LOVE it if you stopped mooning over Bella and Renesmee and went out with me instead!)

So... my personal reactions in parentheses aside, I assure you that you will enjoy reading the essays in this book. I won't lie to you -- some of them are actually quite boring, especially when it comes to explaining really abstract terms. A whole bunch of "yadda, yadda, blah blah" paragraphs. BUT, there are others that were cleverly written and are very enjoyable and thought-tickling. Like these chapters, for instance:

- "Dying to Eat: The Vegetarian Ethics of Twilight" by Jean Kazez
- "To Bite or Not to Bite: Twilight, Immortality, and the Meaning of Life" by Brendan Shea
- "Bella Swan and Sarah Palin: All the Old Myths Are Not True" by Naomi Zack
- "Vampire Love: The Second Sex Negotiates the Twenty-first Century" by Bonnie Mann
- "Edward Cullen and Bella Swan: Byronic and Feminist Heroes... or Not" by Abigail E. Myers
- "The Tao of Jacob" by Rebecca Housel

The ones in boldface are my personal faves -- they all deal with feminism, a topic I find so completely fascinating and engaging. I guess it comes out of my own horror at actually wanting to be Bella at sixteen years old, when I first read Twilight (which was 4 years ago, mind you). And then when you think about the kind of girl Bella is, and more importantly, the choices she freely chooses to make... it's kind of disconcerting.

The girl gave up EVERYTHING to be with her stalker sparkly boyfriend -- friends, family, education. And what? To go through a fatal pregnancy and become a blood-sucking corpse? Sure, she becomes more powerful and faster and stronger than Edward... but all of that was attained because she GAVE UP her sense of SELF. Some people call Bella selfish, but I think she wasn't self-ish enough, if you get what I mean. I think Bella was immature and all-too-willing to define herself as Edward's beloved. Like Sleeping Beauty and Snow White (I call it the "Some day my prince will come!" fallacy).

Let's face it, girls. Twilight is a remarkable and dazzling read to fill in the void of life's stresses and monotony. Sure, it's rich in symbolism and major themes (immortality, vegetarianism, morality, feminism, just to name a few). But in the end, by the time you close Breaking Dawn, you have to remember that all of it is simply a fairy tale. Just because Bella gets her happy ending (or happy eternity, if you will), doesn't mean that you willl, too, if you make the same exact choices as Miss Swan.

So, to all the Twi-tards out there, EARTH to your brain...

Always keep yourself grounded in who you are as an individual. And if you happen to actually meet your own twinkle-toed "cradle-robbing creature of the night boyfriend" (quote from Buffy), then good for you. Just don't lose complete hold of your senses -- or your fabulous individuality -- over a guy.

Because, girlfriend... trust me. You seriously DON'T want to end up like this:

(Image: Kitty from ImpishIdea)

Here's an article you might be interested in, from the same website where I found the delightful comic depicted above: click! While I don't necessarily think that Twilight has an agenda, there are certain points that the author brings up that definitely warrant intelligent discussion over a cup of coffee.

And in case you guys still haven't seen this... Check this video out!!!!



I thought this video was cleverly made. And that's just an understatement. Whoever was behind this, YOU ARE A GENIUS! Here's the website where you can find out more on this kick-ass spin-off: Rebellious Pixels.

Hope you enjoyed reading and watching these as much as I had fun writing this post. ;)