Monday, May 23, 2011

Laundry Lists: Washing Out the Stains in the Spin Cycle

Well, hello everyone.

My family and I survived the end of the world. Apparently group of fundamental Christians thought that the world would end on May 21st, 2011 at approximately 6pm because of some numerological "proofs" found in the Bible. These "proofs" don't really hold much bearing on the natural phenomena of the world. I mean, come on. A massive, apocalyptic earthquake in New York City? How abso-freaking-lutely absurd.

In other miscellaneous news... my sister had her birthday party today. She just turned eighteen. That makes me feel incredibly old, even though I'm a pretty young and fresh twenty-one right now. Time just moves a little too quickly for my liking sometimes.

I also just finished typing out the answers to four questions out of the required six on my take-home philosophy final. I'm a little annoyed that my teacher's making us go to campus just to hand him a hard-copy in addition to emailing the darn thing to him, especially since on the last day of class he said that we only needed to email the document to him. I could be studying for a Cognitive Psychology final (I'm trying to shoot for an A-) rather than wasting two hours of commuting on the subway. Whatever.

I'm sick of the rain, I'm sick of worrying about whether my financial aid will still push through for the next academic year, I'm sick of doing all the administrative legwork for my sister's college (she should be the one doing it now, for cryin' out loud), I'm sick of feeling ugly because of the crookedness of my braces, I'm sick of the fact that I can't fit into my old blouses and jeans in the same way that I used to in high school, and I'm sick of studying for finals. I'm also sick of this writer's block I've been having -- the kind of mental roadblock in which I know what to write, but not really how to write it. In other words, it's the problem of articulating my ideas and making them make sense on paper (or in this case, word processor). With everything else that's been going on lately, however, I haven't been able to get much done.

I just want to relax and get this summer started already. I'd rather work on my internship and my writing projects. I'd rather go out and have some fun with my friends. I'd rather go exploring. I'd rather travel to some new city and explore its culture and history. I want to do something and make something of myself this summer.

I apologize in advance if this entry sounds a lot like a laundry list of things that are currently annoying the bejeezus out of me. I just needed to let out some steam before I jump back into the boiling buildup of pressure that just keeps spinning around and around in my head. I need to get rid of some of the thoughts staining my brain and putting a damper on my mood. Maybe I just need some sleep, I don't know. I'm always saying that, and though I really do mean it, I just can never seem to follow through.

Maybe some of the pressures I've been feeling these past few days have been due to my negative affectivity. In the famous words of Oscar Wilde, "We are each our own devil, and we make this world our hell."

Going along a similar vein, here's a song by Company of Thieves that's been helping me deal with everything, based on Wilde's wise words. This band's actually pretty awesome -- listening to their music is funky and somewhat soothing all at the same time...


Their newly-released album, "Running From a Gamble," is one of the few things I actually look forward to during the week. I'm hoping I can score a free copy of it from FYE, thanks to a "free album coupon" that the band posted on their Facebook page. I'm crossing my fingers that I'll be able to get my very own free copy. We'll see how it goes.

P.S. I'll try to sound a tad chipper in my next post. I think I just need some time to recollect myself and find some kind of inner peace. You're probably thinking, "Inner peace? What? Is she turning into some sort of hippie now?" By inner peace, I mean is some kind of serenity with myself, some kind of quietude within my mind, however flaky that more than likely sounds at the moment. I hope you're faring better than I am with whatever's going on in your lives.

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